ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Foster stages assault on World Rugby headquarters

BY Jack Tunney  ·  Saturday Aug 6, 2022

Following New Zealand’s loss to South Africa in the opening game of their Rugby Championship, Ian Foster has attempted to take control of the World Rugby governing body in an effort to keep hold of the All Blacks world stature.

ADVERTISEMENT

With rumours circulating that there could very well be a further drop in the world rankings for the men in black, Foster has had no choice but to go and stop it at the source. Armed with Ardie Savea at the rear, and his two brand spanking new assistants at his side, Foster has forced his way into the headquarters.

Rudely ignoring the polite welcoming by the building receptionist, Foster stormed straight through, pressing floor number 65 on the elevator. Straight to the top went the team of determined All Blacks.

Foster could be forgiven for his expectations that the chief executive, the top dog, the ruler, would be hailing from the skies. In actual fact, he had missed the correct floor by all of 38 levels and had actually landed amongst the bewildered finance department.

Undeterred by leading the attack the wrong way (not for the first time), Foster has taken ahold of a very confused and quite frankly bewildered accounts division in what will no doubt become known as ‘doing a Foster’ for many moons to come.

Foster has made his demands clear, give New Zealand the number 1 spot back, give them the 2023 World Cup trophy, and to take back his P45.

Rumour has it Rassie Erasmus is currently underway recording a 5-hour video on why the All Blacks cheated their way to the 1987 World Cup victory, currently titled ‘Rassie makes it about Rassie, again’.

ADVERTISEMENT

This situation is still live, more to follow.

*Obviously satire, Foster would never put in so much effort.

Related Articles

  • 44 WEEKS AGO

    World Cup winner to return after year long...

  • 45 WEEKS AGO

    Rugby league golden boot star set for huge...

  • 61 WEEKS AGO

    Hurricanes miss the memo as New Zealand clubs...



ADVERTISEMENT

Great Tries

  • 12 HOURS AGO

    Bears fly as 100 metre finish already touted as try of the season

  • 6 DAYS AGO

    Hassell-Collins pounces on HUGE Sharks mistake in chaotic scenes

  • 2 WEEKS AGO

    Supporters can't believe Saracens Sharp's UNBELIEVABLE finish

  • 6 WEEKS AGO

    Fans in awe as Joyce finishes ‘impossible’ solo try

  • 9 WEEKS AGO

    WATCH: Outlandish Jacob Stockdale finish is truly world class

View All

Big Hits & Dirty Play

  • 4 WEEKS AGO

    Wallabies wunderkind Sua'ali' and Scotland captain Tuipulotu clash

  • 5 WEEKS AGO

    Ireland 'steal' Argentina's opening try as debate rages

  • 7 WEEKS AGO

    WATCH: The biggest hit from week one of the Autumn Nations Series

  • 10 WEEKS AGO

    'Cheap shot' from Leicester Tigers vs Northampton Saints causing a stir online

  • 10 WEEKS AGO

    Wild moment leads to all in brawl during Welsh derby between Cardiff and Scarlets

View All

See It To Believe It

  • 2 WEEKS AGO

    Supporters can't believe Saracens Sharp's UNBELIEVABLE finish

  • 6 WEEKS AGO

    Fans in awe as Joyce finishes ‘impossible’ solo try

  • 9 WEEKS AGO

    Insane moment as french backrow waves off medic and smokes Ange Capuozzo

  • 9 WEEKS AGO

    Incredible drop goal helps break 25-match losing streak

  • 11 WEEKS AGO

    Leinster fly half delivers insane 50:22 after being given start for Emerging Ireland

View All

Funnies

  • 19 HOURS AGO

    'A dog with a mallet up its arse could’ve written Johnny’s book' Donnacha O'Callaghan

  • 1 WEEK AGO

    ‘The knee slide was too much’ - Ben Earl reflects on THAT viral moment

  • 1 WEEK AGO

    U.S. Army Special Operations Sergeant Major makes big claim about rugby

  • 6 WEEKS AGO

    “Put that in the book” - Rieko Ioane’s explosive post reignites feud with Sexton

  • 7 WEEKS AGO

    Mischievous Marcus Smith spotted engaging in the dark arts during All Blacks match

View All

Amateur

  • 102 WEEKS AGO

    You Won’t See Many Better Than This Silky-Smooth Try From Llandovery RFC

  • 102 WEEKS AGO

    Incredible Scenes As Caldy RFC Hand Ealing First Championship Defeat Of The Season

  • 125 WEEKS AGO

    Dubious Score Decides Result Of Rugby's Biggest Schools Fixture

  • 125 WEEKS AGO

    Incredible Scenes At School Boys Rugby Match

  • 125 WEEKS AGO

    The Next Dominant Backrow?

View All

Player Features

  • 1 WEEK AGO

    ‘The knee slide was too much’ - Ben Earl reflects on THAT viral moment

  • 1 WEEK AGO

    Marcus Smith makes big call on his future

  • 4 WEEKS AGO

    'Eligible for England' - Fans react to South African star's contract announcement

  • 5 WEEKS AGO

    The 19-year-old named the 'future' of English rugby after win against Australia A

  • 5 WEEKS AGO

    Anthony Watson exclusive: 'I wouldn't be surprised if England win'

View All